For Children and Young People

Like other children and young people you probably want the violence to stop, but you might not be sure about what you can do. It’s really important to remember that:

Domestic violence is not your fault and it is not your responsibility to stop it from happening. You have a right to be safe.

Sometimes, you might feel like you don’t have any choices or you don’t have the power to change anything. Maybe you think that running away from home or trying to stop a fight are the only ways to make the violence or abuse stop. They’re not the only choices. It’s important that you are safe and that you can stop feeling scared.

There are some things you can do and there is help out there for you – you’re not alone.

www.thehideout.org.uk is a great website with more information for children and young people

Go to www.thehideout.org.uk/refuge if you would like to see what a refuge is like.

Talk to Someone:
Call our Helpline on 07866 510 728 and talk to us.
In an emergency call 999.

Childline 0800 11 11 - is a free helpline for children and young people in the UK. You can call to talk about any problem. You are not alone, almost 2000 children a year contact childline about domestic violence problems.

Young People

Does your boyfriend or girlfriend...

• Tell you what to wear, where to go or what to spend your money on?
• Try to make you do things you don’t want to do, such as drinking too much or taking drugs?
• Think being drunk makes it okay to be nasty to you?
• Say sorry for being nasty then do it again?
• Get very jealous or angry?
• Shove, grab, scratch, pinch, hit, kick you or hold you down?

None of these things are loving, sexy or romantic. They are warning signs that the relationship isn’t right and could become more dangerous.

You could end up losing your self confidence and sense of identity, being threatened and scared or even being seriously hurt.

This is dating abuse. Almost all types of domestic abuse are against the law. Being forced to have sex is a crime - even in a relationship it’s still rape.

Get advice

If you’re in this situation, there’s lots you can do:

Call our Helpline on 07866 510 728 and talk to us.

In an emergency call 999.

Childline 0800 11 11 - is a free helpline for children and young people in the UK. You can call to talk about any problem. You are not alone, almost 2000 children a year contact childline about domestic violence problems.

Remember:

• You have the right to healthy and safe relationships.
• You deserve respect. Do not put up with abuse, talk to someone about it.
• Just because someone is drunk or on drugs doesn’t mean they can get away with abusing you.
• Be aware of the risks of having your drink spiked.
• Being forced to have sex is a crime. If you don’t want to, say ‘no’.
• Being angry doesn’t give someone the right to hurt you.
• You’re not alone. This happens to a lot of young people.
• You have not done anything wrong.
• You are not responsible for how others behaves.

“I moved to the refuge because dad didn’t get on with mum. Mum would do something nice for him then he’d get in a temper. Dad used to hit mum and when this happened I felt scared because I thought mum was going to die. I could hear them fighting and would see the marks on mum afterwards. When we came to the refuge I thought it was cool, better than home. I have lots of friends and people helping.”